So, chemo round 1...

So far, chemo round 1 is a wonderful, fantastic let down. God I really hope I'm not going to regret writing that tomorrow.

I grant you, the actual process of being in the opium den, with Triangle Smurf bringing out yet another bag of poison to put in my arm was about as much fun as, I don't know, a really really boring overlong lunch, with crap food and no wine, that you HAVE to stay at because it would be rude to leave. And you leave feeling spaced out and a bit sick - same deal really.

Over the next two days (I am now in day 3), I swallow too many anti-sick pills to count, but they do seem to be working. Largely by making me go to sleep. I finally get it sorted - the little ones are about an hours nap, the middle ones are 2-3 hours and the mothers are 3+ hours of deep sleep. So I chose my cocktail on how "out of it" I want to be, and for how long and it's working just fine.

This morning I take the dogs for a long walk - which is very soothing to the soul (I love the Chinese Cemetery early in the morning - so peaceful and natural - birdsong everywhere and no man made sounds).

Sadly I fall down a crack in the road and scrape my knee which is NOT what is required whilst white blood cells are low, so have to go home for emergency ER in the boot-room. Swabs, wipes, antiseptic wipes, antiseptic cream, spray on plaster - check! I am so not used to having to take care of myself quite so well........

Then J drives me back to the clinic for my regular (24 hours after chemo) white blood cell booster. After today, he will be giving me this jab at home, so he is in full student mode. I hope he's learning properly but he doesn't seem to be concentrating NEARLY hard enough. He reassures me he's given injections to oranges before, when in the army. That makes me feel better, then. Hmmmm.

I try and get out of Triangle Smurf whether I am going to start to feel bad. She assures me that if I can get past day 3 without too much sickness, then I should be ok. The jab will give me bone ache in my pelvis to be managed by nurofen for a couple of days and then I'll be well for the weekend.

I am assuming this is a "The Thing" kind of well, rather than "Way Hay let's get the Tequila shots in" kind of well, but we'll see. We've got 3 wedding parties to go to - so I best hunt out that red, white and blue after all.......

I am not posting this yet out of fear that The Thing will avenge this and come and hit me big time over the next day or so...

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Triangle Smurf is a liar. Well that serves me right for being smug. Day 4 arrives with a vengeance. I feel like I've got flu, but without the fever - mega headache behind the eyes, sickness levels have gone up to "not actually being sick but expecting it any moment" levels with a bit of dry heaving thrown in. My back also feels as though I've slept in the most uncomfortable bed ever (not true - our bed is bliss - this is the bones in my back regenerating white blood cells. Good for them.)

J calls CC for help and advice, and she adjusts some dosages and brings a few of the "just in case" drugs into play. I immediately go to sleep for the next 12 hours and J and the kids go to watch some wedding or other......

Saturday morning arrives and is no better - I take more drugs, feel sick and go to sleep again.

Then suddenly I'm awake and feeling OK. I'm not about to crack open the tequila any time soon, but I eat lunch with everyone, and feel normal again.

I think this is what it is going to like.

As zen-like and serene as ever, J xx